Caregiver Healdsburg CA
Sometimes as a family caregiver you need to remind yourself about some basic facts that help to ground you and bring you back to reality a bit. It’s easy to start believing that there is more that you could be doing or that you could be doing those things better. The reality is that you have to encourage yourself and these reminders can help you to do that.
“I’m Doing the Best That I Can”
When you’re feeling that you could be doing better with something than you are, whether it’s handling a situation better emotionally or performing a task better, this is what you need to tell yourself. Everyone is doing the best that they can with any given situation with the skills and the knowledge that they have at that moment. Give yourself the space to accept that.
“I’m Not Perfect and That’s Okay”
No one is perfect and that includes family caregivers. You might be having a bad day, so you snap at someone. You might not have the information that you need to make a good decision and that’s all okay. You have to allow yourself to make mistakes. There’s no one who could be perfect at every aspect of caregiving for your elderly loved one, so you are just as qualified for the job as anyone.
“Doing What Works Right Now Is Enough”
This is another reminder you can give yourself when you’re tempted by perfectionism. Sometimes you have to let good enough simply be good enough. You can’t always get the lawn mowed exactly when it needs mowing. Or you might not perform other tasks perfectly right at that moment. But you can revisit tasks and situations later when you have more to give to them.
“I Can’t Control Everything That Happens”
You might also be tempted to try to control every single thing that affects your loved one. But the unfortunate truth is that you can’t control everything. You can’t control your loved one’s health or how he reacts to the news that he needs to change his diet. You also can’t control the majority of situations that crop up during the day. The best that you can do is to control your attitude and your own reaction to those situations.
Try talking to yourself the way that you would to a close friend or family member. You might find that you have kinder words for them than you often do for yourself.